I’m getting totally focused on changing myself. Even though it looks so freaking easy, I’ve been studying for the written drivers test. Once I get my permit a friend is going to teach me how to drive & let me take the behind the wheel in his car. So, when tax season comes around, I can put a decent down payment on a quality vehicle!
November, I am starting my new health thing. It’s never too late or too early to make a damn change. I’m going to start before I lose my “I just had a baby” excuse. It’ll show me, there’s no excuse.
First ten days, I’m going to try to juice. Then soda & snacks are eliminated until I learn discipline. While I am doing this system cleanse, I’ll be starting Focus T25 & Insanity, then ease my way back to running. I’m going to give myself half a year to get to be able to run a half marathon!
I have to set the standard, no one is going to set higher standards for me than myself!
Let’s do this!!
Health & diet plan coming soon
I am insecure. My sister is prettier than me.
It’s totally in that way where you reassure the other one they’re beautiful, because you feel guilty that you’re even more so.
Then, people thinks she’s nicer. Sometimes I don’t see how, because of the way she treats us. But people change in different environments.
But I guess, because I’m so strong willed & don’t take shit, it makes me a bitch. Whatever though..
I don’t need people, I don’t need reassurance.
I try not to hate her, but I’m just so angry. She took a guy I had liked, no big deal now. I have a baby with the love of my life, but it’s the principle of the matter. I met him first, it was quite obvious the way I felt. I believe I even verbally called dibs. Am I so wrong for feeling betrayed?
It feels so much like my life got invaded. Some of my friends even liked her better. I don’t let loose like that, I have a sort of reserve. A way I want to be viewed.
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate my sister. But with me trying to get her out & about, I sabotaged my own life.